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The Blind Leading The Blind WARNING TO ALL SPORT PURISTS OUT THERE … STOP READING NOW BECAUSE I WILL BASICALLY BE TELLING YOU HOW STUPID YOU ARE. Are they gone? Good. Now for the rest of the intelligent community at large, let’s talk about one of the most glaring problems in organized sports today. No it’s not drugs. If these spoiled overgrown babies wanna coke themselves to death, so be it. Do it, get it over with and die so that someone who actually respects the sport and has the desire to PLAY can come off the bench and start for your sorry ass. And no it’s not high-school athletes making the jump to the pros too early either. For those of you who see a problem with this, tell me that when YOU’RE the one struggling through high school and an after school job while mom works two jobs of her own just to feed you and your two siblings. No my friends, the problem I speak of is much greater … much more widespread … and much more detrimental to sports as we know it. I am speaking of BAD OFFICIATING. Referees, umpires, sideline judges, etc and so on have the power to make or break a game and yet are immune from any of the repercussions. I touched on this in the very first FTSOI article way back when, so let’s start there. Baseball, like all sports, has a clearly defined set of rules on what CAN and CANNOT be done during the course of the game. Baseball even clearly defines the area that is known as the STRIKE ZONE and yet that is stretched and mangled according to which umpire is behind the plate. (SEE FTSOI #1) That is simply not right. A strike is a strike. Anything that falls OUTSIDE that strike zone is NOT a strike. Easy right? It must be harder than that since home plate umpires routinely change their strike zones depending on who’s pitching. If that is acceptable behavior, then why have the home plate umpire at all? Why not have the batter or the catcher call balls and strikes? Or better yet. Have the pitcher do it. Any of these guys is as qualified, if not MORE so, to be able to tell what did and what did not fall within the aforementioned strike zone. After all, if human error is part of the game, then let’s give the right to err to the players. When all is said and down, the players know better than anyone else what they did or failed to do. You know what irks me the most about the strike zone? The fucking baseball commentators who will look at a bad call and say, “Well, so and so, gives up that wide strike zone but as long as he’s consistent, players will have to deal with it.” CONSISTENT? Consistently what? Consistently WRONG that’s what! If your brain surgeon were consistently wrong, do you know what you would be today? That’s right, a succotash. But by no means am I comparing baseball umpires to brain surgeons … they’re more like the succotash. How about Jeffrey Maier’s blatant interference during the 1996 ALCS between the Yankees and the Orioles? For those of you who don’t know, Derek Jeter hit a shot towards the right field wall where Tony Tarrasco was waiting to make a clean play on a can of corn. Instead, some punk bitch kid reaches OVER the wall and snags Jeter’s ball on it’s way down into Tarrasco’s glove. An easy call you say? Fan intereference, no question right? You would be wrong. Umpire Richie Garcia called it a home run and the Yankees were given the first game of the series. Human error cost the Orioles that game. And Richie Garcia goes home with his union paycheck regardless.
Instant replay was born in the NFL BECAUSE of a bad call. That alone makes me respect football much more than baseball because at least they are trying to correct mistakes before they determine a game. Not that it always works. Vinny Testaverde was the beneficiary of one such call when during a 98-99 game against Seattle, Vinny dove forward towards the goal line only to be stopped a few feet short. However, while down on the ground, Vinny extended his arms forward with the ball to cross the goal line, prompting the drunk referees to signal touchdown. The Jets won that game and advanced to the playoffs, when they clearly should have lost. That ref however, went home and got drunker, only to work another game. At least now, instant replay forces them to drink LESS during a game. Basketball is not immune either. Back in the heydey of Michael Jordan (not the current Michael who is embarrassing his team and himself) and Patrick Ewing (not the current Patrick who is embarrassing his team and himself), these players could take 14 steps to the basket and not get called for travelling. Even then it was wrong. So fucking call them for it! Basketball purists will tell you that, “He’s a superstar and he should get the superstar calls.” Fuck that noise! Again, there is a clearly defined set of rules stating what is and what is not acceptable. Holding onto the ball with both hands and strolling 14 steps to the basket while eating an ice cream cone is not acceptable. If you’re gonna call it for a scrub like Fred Hoiberg, then call it for Mike and Patrick as well. Basketball does not use instant replay either so it will be as bad as baseball for a long time. So what’s the soultion? Easy. PENALIZE THE PENALIZERS!!! WATCH THE WATCHMEN!!! When an ump makes a bad call, correct it right there on the field. Don’t let it affect the game’s outcome. Then mark it down and sit that official down later and tell him, “Look Ray Charles, you fucked this call up pretty badly. You get one more chance then it’s adios.” With all the technology our sports have at their disposal, don’t tell me we can’t set up multiple cameras to capture every moment and every non-call. If a mistake happens again to a ref who has been previously warned, boot him. Game over. Here’s a tin cup full of pencils, stake yourself out a corner and get to work. Bring up a rookie ump and give him his shot at the big time. I’ll bet you ump will make more correct calls that way. When all is said and done, refs are paid to do their job CORRECTLY. Just like Joe Construction Worker and Tom Brain Surgeon. And just like thos guys, when they mess up, they should be reprimanded and fired if necessary. If you disagree, YOU are the only human error here. Go away. The Armchair QB
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12/1/01
More baseball
idocy: Chuck Knoblauch’s phantom tag during the 1999 ALCS
between the Red Sox and ... oh my look … the Yankees. Look
at this picture. Is Chuck Knoblauch tagging Jose Offerman? For
the record, I am closer to you than that “tag” was.
Umpire Tim Tschida however, saw a tag all the way and called
it as such, giving Knoblauch a double play as he threw to first.
Umpire Tim Tschida is an idiot. He even admitted after the game
that it was a bad call but it’s all academic by then. Baseball
doesn’t have instant replay. A bad call stands regardless
of how it affects the outcome and the umpires making those bad
calls go home satisfied with a job poorly done. Baseball purists
don’t WANT instant replay because they want the ability
to be wrong and not to have to answer to anyone about it.|
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